Each New Year my friend John takes it upon himself (thanks) to find out what the year will bring and to find it’s ‘name’. If you knew John you would know he does this with a bit of ‘cheek’; more Hunter S Thompson than illuminated soul. Or?
Anyway below are his findings:
Dear Friends, Initiates and Bewildered Bystanders,
As we bid adieu to 2015, the year of the Princess, it is time to reveal what kind of year to expect in 2016. Once again on our behalf I undertook the arduous spiritual journey to beseech the Oracle to name the coming year so at least we can have some idea what to expect.
Setting out across the cold dark Mojave I followed the North Star and a sign sent by the Oracle. It was a postcard from the Golden Nugget. I was headed to Vegas. As some of you know the Oracle is a degenerate gambler, a womanizer and a mean drunk. No matter. Out west we don’t pass judgment on a man’s hobbies as long as he gets the job done.
By the time I got to the Nugget police were starting to set up a perimeter. The Oracle had taken over the pool and lobby area and was inciting some sort of bacchanalian festival. The sound system was so loud that the fire marshal was concerned about the structural integrity of nearby buildings.
So I wasn’t actually able to speak to the Oracle this year but with the help of the pizza delivery guy and the hostage negotiator I was able to exchange written messages. My heart sank when I saw what he had written. “2016 the year of Dengue Fever”
What could be worse? In the year of the Princess we had all tried to actualize our better selves. I think we’re all about sick of that but Dengue Fever! I felt sick. My ears were ringing from the noise and then it hit me! The band was playing “Shave your Beard.” He meant the band not the fever!
2016 is going to be exotic, mysterious with a catchy riff and an undercurrent of foreboding. About time I say! Happy 2016.
John Burke, Ventura, California December 31, 2015
2016 The year of Dengue Fever.
2015 The year of the Princess.
2014 The year of breaking Uneven.
2013 The year Self-reliance made a comeback
2012 The year apathy reached its apogee
2011 The year we took a break
2010 The Year of Doing One Thing Right
2009 The year of The Second Coming
2008 The year of Looks Good From My House
2007 The year of Emancipation
2006 The year of Drifting Fog
2005 The year of Active Waiting
2004 The year Misses Manners Gets Even
2003 The year we forgot to write stuff down
1990 The year of Doing Less
1989 The year of Living Every Day Like Your Hair’s on Fire
VIDEO: shave your beard